Into the Depths: The Call

Thursday, February 08, 2007

The Call

I made the call. I was scared, I mumbled, I tripped over my own words.....but I made the call. He said my assumptions were wrong. He said they were irrational. But, he said it with kindness and understanding. When I said rationalism wasn't my forte, he said no that isn't it, it's our human nature. We all make assumptions based on what we think someone's reaction to us means. Even him. He said he was glad I called because I needed to so he could set my mind at ease. And, he said I could join the church. So, however unpleasant, it was a good call, a necessary call and a worthwhile call.

My group was not so great tonight. I guess it was fine, I just wasn't that great in it. Now I'm disappointed in myself. Perhaps I should just be content with one good and healthy act per day.

Can you tell by reading this that I am so exhausted I can barely see straight. I can tell by my typing. I am going to try really hard to make myself pass out now. Maybe I will NyQuil myself to sleep.


Blogger heartsjoy said...

WOW!! What a huge step! I am soo proud of you! I am so glad he confirmed for you that what you were thinking was not like that! I am also so glad you are free to join! I know that wasn't easy but don't you feel soo much better! Yea!! Confrontation can be good! :)

February 10, 2007 11:25 PM  
Blogger Bttrfly1976 said...

Let's not go overboard here! ;)

February 11, 2007 12:52 AM  
Blogger LiteratureLover said...

Double Wow! I am so impressed with your courage. I would have been shaking in my shoes or not doing it at all. I'm proud of you and I'm so glad that it all worked out.

February 11, 2007 4:53 PM  
Blogger Bttrfly1976 said...

Don't be fooled, I was shaking alright!! Thanks for being proud of me, even I'm proud of me which is a shocker in and of itself!

February 11, 2007 9:34 PM  

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