www.flickr.com
Into the Depths: Church Or Lack There Of

Sunday, June 25, 2006

Church Or Lack There Of

I should be getting ready for church. After having gone to church my entire life, I have in the past year and a half somewhat given up on it. I still go, all-be-it sporadically, perhaps every month or so. I currently sit at 7 weeks of absence. My problem now is that I don't feel like I can still go to the church I had been attending for the past three years. Long story that I will probably never go into here. It seems so overwhelming to me, however, to go out and try to find a new church. The only people I know, I know from church, so I can't just go to a 'friend's' church. I am going to have to just go out and walk in one that....what?... looks like a nice church by the name of it?? I don't know. Being that I am tremendously avoidant in dealing with social situations at this stage in my life, I am not really sure how I will walk, alone, into a room full of strangers. I could just put all my feelings out of my mind and go to my old church this morning. I know what will happen when I get there. I will feel overwhelmingly uncomfortable, begin rehashing my self-defeating guilt, start wondering why I went in the first place, wonder if anyone will notice if I just get up and walk out, suffer through the sermon that I can put no stock in, then leave feeling far worse than when I got there and asking myself why I bothered. Sounds like a happy Sunday. Maybe I will just sit here on the couch and think about trying to go to church again next Sunday.

7 Comments:

Blogger LiteratureLover said...

You may just need a little time of detox from church. Maybe you could start going to a Bible study of some kind that would be more intimate and help you get to know people before attending that church.

June 25, 2006 3:10 PM  
Blogger Paulette said...

Hello,
That is a great Idea. It is hard to change. I believe God does lay it on our hearts when the time is right.
WhatI did when I knew it was time for a change I looked up 4 churches in my immediate area (on the internet) I looked in the areas of service I was interested in. I would go only for the worship service, and sat in the back. The second church I visited I knew it was the right one, I have been amazingly active ever since.
Wish you lived near me in Texas I would love for you to visit!! Hope you find a peace.
Have a great day

June 25, 2006 5:13 PM  
Blogger Paulette said...

Oh My wordddd, I just posted,,, I said I wish you lived by me you could visit my church... I go to church in Fortworth.. I just went back and read your profile, Tooo funny, now I wonder if we attend the same church???
Sorry, I attend SouthCliff, off I20 and Grandbury road. It is right off the express way with the big steeple. Anyhow it is an awesome church, very warm and welcoming, and you are welcome to visit.
I've enjoyed your site as well.

June 25, 2006 5:20 PM  
Blogger heartsjoy said...

Church searching can be challenging. I think a small group would be nice as well. It makes it easier to make those relationships that are sometimes not as easy in a large group. Sounds like you already have some great suggestions! :)

June 25, 2006 6:20 PM  
Blogger Andreia said...

Im with you on this one. I too have taken a sabaatical. It is really hard to go to a new place with kids and especially when you invested so much in the old place!

This weekend I drove around my house in a five mile radius and decided that I would go to church somewhere within that space. Crazy I know.

I hope you find a spot!

June 26, 2006 6:14 PM  
Blogger SuperMom said...

I think a bible study would be exactly what you need. A place where you could feel free to ask some of the question that have been on your heart.

LitLover is right on track.

June 26, 2006 8:47 PM  
Blogger Bttrfly1976 said...

ok, call me an idiot, but how do you find a Bible study if you don't go to church?

June 27, 2006 6:48 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home